Sorry about my hiatus, I've had so much going on lately, it's actually quite crazy.

My great uncle died on Thursday, and mum and I have been moving into our new apartment.

I promise to post properly once my life is a bit more organized :)

<3

I do not have any photos, but I do have news.

a) I'm finished high school, forever.

b) I ATE CHINESE FOOD.

If you're asking yourself did you read that right, you sure did ;) Tonight, mum and I randomly decided to stop at a place near our house called 'Oodles of Noodles' (cute name) and get some food. We got the vegetarian noodles to share and OMG. I can't believe I ever stopped eating this. We got to watch them make it, they barely put any oil in, and they stir fried it all healthy like. Which made me happy, because even if I need to challenge ED, I have always been a firm believer in trying to be healthy. They were so good, we shared a takeaway box and there was so much in it, that when mum put her heap in the bowl it looked like there was way more than half left.

Anyways, I was proud of myself. For both pieces of news stated above. I'm free!! From school at least, and one step closer to being free from ED.

Today was spent studying in the city, I decided not to go the library because it's air conditioned and obviously I still get cold pretty easily. Last time I studied there I was pretty distracted the whole time because I was so cold. Instead I went to the shopping centre, and sat where they have little tables with powerpoints set up. Only problem was it smelt a bit like fast food and fried chicken (to say a bit is an understatement), but at least I wasn't freezing my fingers off!!

Breakfast was cereal, but my study fuel was a little different:

Apricot-coconut fruit bar, and Cherry Pie Larabar.

I really liked the Larabar, I haven't tasted this flavour before but it was yummy, and held me over well during my studying.

Next comes the iffy part. Skip over if you are likely to be triggered, etc. Although I don't really say anything too triggering (I hope). I went to my mum's work this afternoon to get a cup of tea with her. We ended up having some roast vegetables and bread at a local cafe - let me tell you, these vegetables had so much oil on them it was unbelievable. Even mum agreed. I soaked off some of it with a napkin. Afterwards, I started freaking out, and crying, about how I will gain so much because it was like two tbsp of oil which equals XXX calories which is more than the meal should have been, and generally stressing out. On my way home I still stressed out, and seriously contemplated not having dinner. I went back and forth on that issue so many times, but eventually made myself a pita bread pizza. I lay on the couch and cried afterward. I just felt (and still feel) so fat, and horrible. I keep trying to tell myself 'you won't gain weight in one day' but it's not working, I can't calm myself down.

Sorry to be such a downer. I'm just sick of this life, if you can even call it that. I want to go outside and walk, but I'm so lazy that I can't even be bothered, all I want to do is cry.

<3

Only one more exam until I'm free!!
Wednesday, 5.15pm is the date and time of said freedom :D I can't wait, but I'm still really nervous about the International Studies exam. We have to answer short answer questions, do 3 extended responses and 1 essay. The Media exam was easier than I expected, it actually wasn't that different from last years, which was good, because I used that to study for the exam. Oh, Philosophy was alright, a bit draining.

What does a soon-to-be graduated girl eat for breakfast before a big day full of exams?? Some cinnspice layered oats, of course ;)

Lunch was a sandwich, gobbled up between exams (plus maybe two bottles of diet coke :S). Dinner is TBC (to be confirmed).
The lovely Jessica tagged me in this little quiz, so here we go:

1. favorite variety of apple? pink lady. reminds me of Grease :D
2. apples dipped in..? boysenberry soy yoghurt.
3. favorite way to enjoy pumpkin? soup, or mashed with cinnamon and paprika.
4. favorite soup? with crackers or bread? pumpkin, with sourdough.
5. do you eat orange foods all year round? yes, they're the best kind ;)
6. most used spice in your autumn cooking: cinnamon, of course.
7. you are baking some homemade bread, what flavor combination of bread would you like to make? choc banana, or pumpkin cinnamon.
8. favorite autumn vegetables and ways to eat it? pumpkin, any way baby.
9. hot chocolate, hot cider, coffee or tea? tea, especially ginger.
10. favorite seasonal dessert? oat pancakes, or waffles.
11. lets make a fall stew! pick any 6 ingredients to create your one: pumpkin, broccoli, carrot, beans, cauliflower, corn.
12. pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, walnuts or almonds to snack on? almonds.
13. popcorn flavor/seasoning? salt and vinegar.
14. bowl of hot cereal you have been wanting to try: pumpkin oats.
15. post a link to a recipe that you recently bookmarked: oops, I actually deleted my bookmarks the other day, I'm cleaning out my laptop.

I tag Eleanor, Tatianna and Meg.

I'm not too interesting, but I hope that was entertaining :P Well, time to go study/listen to Owl City non stop.

Love <3

Only a short post today, because my Philosophy books are staring at me.

:(

Today I had waffles for lunch.

And some of this.

Note to self: possibly drink less diet coke/coke zero??

It's weird, ED loves and hates this stuff. Loves it because it fills me up, and the calories, hates it because he thinks it will make me fat because of the chemicals and such. Blah.

I had yabc this morning again, seriously tiring. All I really want to do right now is sleep, but I have to study. It wasn't just physically tiring, but emotionally as well. One of the girls there has really been annoying me lately, for various reasons, and today one of the other girls, who is also a friend of mine, said to me during break "are you actually going to eat??" Not everyone was eating, and I prefer to wait for my lunch which was in 30 mins. But her comment upset me. That and she also said "Gain some weight, I don't like being able to feel people's bones." Err, okay, sure. :S It made me feel self conscious for the rest of the class.

Anyway, study time now lovies.

<3

I hope you guys liked the video post, it only took me a million years to figure out how to do it ;)
Next time I'll probably (hopefully) be on my baby, and I won't look like a ghost/goth!!

This morning I had yabc, and it was so hot, it was so horrible dancing in the un-airconditioned hall!! Lucky I love it, because I was tempted not to go today. I have another rehearsal tomorrow. After yabc mum and I went out to lunch at an Indian restaurant. At many points ED was telling me all kinds of things about how I would blow up like a balloon etc. etc., but you know what I said in reply?? F-off, ED, don't ruin this for me. I just did 3 hours of dancing, so just go stuff yourself in a mushroom. Yes I did say mushroom. :P

The other day I got an email from yabc with an attachment about the 2010 Adelaide tour. It turns out that while we’re in Adelaide we won’t only be performing at the Fringe Festival, but also in various schools around Adelaide!! I wish I knew which ones. Anyway, I also found out which places we will be performing at in Melbourne in January. I get free tickets, so if any of you girls are from Melbourne and want to see me perform (with about 40 other people); let me know which venue you want to come to!! Here are the dates and venues:

Saturday 30th January – Substation Arts Centre, Newport.
Sunday 31st January – Frankston Arts Centre
Saturday 6th February – Coburg Town Hall
Sunday 7th February – The Castle, Dandenong and Berwick Secondary College
Saturday 13th February – Maroondah Secondary College (Croydon)
Sunday 14th February – Cromwell Road Theatre, South Yarra

As I said, let me know so I can hook you up!! ;)
Oh, and don’t you Adelaide ladies fret – I’ll be in Adelaide from the 8th of March until the 14th of March. Hopefully soon I find out which schools we’ll be performing at, it would be awesome if it was any of yours!!

And I forgot to answer jibbalibba’s question from the other day: I got my smooze icy poles from Coles, they’re in the section with all the ice cream toppings and cones. They were really good, by the way.

I'm off to study for media. Sorry, I haven't commented many blogs today, but that's because I just got home and I really need to study. I'll catch up on my commenting soon.

<3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFjMdztk3Nk
TGIF.
I'm sorry about the quality/sound delay/etc. of this video, I was using my lame webcam on this laptop. I'll be able to post better ones once I can use my Macbook. I get so awkward and shy on camera :\

Anyway, I had my new cereal for breakfast this morning. It was pretty good, well scratch that, it was delicious :) I kind of forgot to take a photo before I ate it though so here's what it looked like towards the end:

Delicioooous. Look at all them oat clusters ;) My only problem was that I only got two sultanas in my serve!! Mum told me that they all went near the bottom of the packet. Naughty 'tanas :P

I really should study at some point today, I have a mountain of media and philosophy books waiting for me. No, seriously, a MOUNTAIN. But after the exam yesterday, I need a bit of a chill out session. Oh, the exam!! I kind of winged it (wung it?) through the exam yesterday, I left one of the essay questions, but all I need to do with this subject is pass, so it's all good. No stress (well there was a bit yesterday, but shh).

I'm actually at my grandparent's house today, because the doctor I went to is down the road from their house, plus they're in Cairns at the moment so they won't know haha. The doctor's appointment went okay, they think my chest pains are anxiety so they prescribed some anti-depressant/anxiety pill things, and I basically had to get weighed etc. again. He wants me to come see me once a week now, instead of in a month like we originally planned. He also told me I need to limit my water intake (but but....I love H20) and drink gatorade type drinks (blech). One thing that weirded me out was that he told me to do exercise that makes me really sweat, like full on exercise?? Uh, does he not see me at the moment?? :\

Well, I hope you all have a great day, I know I always say this, but seriously I love you all.
Ich liebe dich <3